Today, there are various therapies and methods in the fight against stuttering, and some are free and available to everyone, while for some you have to pay. Everything I will say in this chapter is my personal opinion and the experience that I have experienced going through certain therapies and methods for the purpose of suppressing or "removing" stuttering.
Speech therapist
First thing I did when it was noticed that I stuttered was - a visit to a speech therapist. I recommend this to everyone as a first step because, after all, speech therapists are specialized in speech disorders and can greatly help you or give you further advice.
My personal experience of going to a speech therapist was not very useful because all I did there was read "out loud" and everything was recorded on cassettes or tapes. You have to understand that it was a long time ago (early 90's) and that the approaches to stuttering back then were not what they are today, so I still recommend visiting a speech therapist as the first step for parents even today. Furthermore, since I did not achieve anything by going to the speech therapist, my parents looked for other options.
Group therapy with a psychiatrist
Unfortunately, this was my parents' mistake, but as I said before - back then there was a completely different approach to stuttering and it was not easy to get information via the Internet etc. Don't worry, these therapies were not like the ones you see in the movies where they "fill" you up with pills and keep you imprisoned in rooms. I came to therapy every day accompanied by my parents and stayed there for an hour or two with other children who had other mental disorders, and I didn't really understand why I was there.
But, since I was always a playful child, staying there was fun and interesting to me, and we always had some workshops, plays, etc. where I felt great, but none of that contributed to reducing or completely eliminating stuttering, so we quickly gave up on that too.
Placebo pills that "cure stuttering" and group hypnosis
I was even taking some placebo pills for a while, which (according to my memory) were not very cheap, but we stopped using them after the dose was used up.
I attended group hypnosis in Vinkovci and it was organized in a hotel (I don't remember the name) where there were a lot of people who stuttered. Of course, at no point was I hypnotized and the whole procedure was a bit ridiculous to me. I didn't stop stuttering. Remember that hypnosis is different from self-hypnosis as we will talk about it in another chapter.
Valmod therapy
Therapy that changed my life. After a long time of not attending any therapy, at the age of 25 I went to Valmod therapy in Varaždin. The therapy that taught me how I can fight stuttering if I really make a firm decision and follow all the techniques and rules. Of course, I am not allowed to talk about these techniques in detail, but it is around 12 days of almost complete isolation and persistent daily work on yourself, speech and technique that you will never forget for the rest of your life.
In the end, that therapy changed my life in the sense that I realized that (my) stuttering is not as big a problem in my life as I thought it was, and it helped me overcome so many negative thoughts that I simply decided I didn't need to practice anymore and I am happy and satisfied with myself. Please understand that I stutter moderately - a lot in stressful situations, but I also have days when I hardly stutter at all. In that therapy, I met a lot of people who almost couldn't utter a word how much they stuttered, but also those who almost didn't stutter at all, but had "quiet moments" (moments when the person just stops talking and continues after a few seconds).
If you don't have the strength, will, desire or time (although you should always have it for yourself) to try to beat your stuttering yourself, Valmod therapy is the best therapy you can go to if you want to beat stuttering.
Self therapy
This is the most important part of this chapter and the main question is:
No, this is not some cheap propaganda you read in "spam" e-mail or similar. These are very important questions that you should honestly answer for yourself. We live in a modern age and access to information about anything we are interested in is always within reach or just one click away.
The only problem is that we don't feel like working on ourselves, we don't have the will to do it, we don't have the time, we look for excuses, and then later we complain and blame everything possible except ourselves for the reasons things are the way they are and we are not satisfied with ourselves.
It's always easier when there's something ready, quick, something where we don't have to work hard to get great results. Well... If you want to stop stuttering, there is no such thing. There is no magic pill, magic treatment, magic hypnosis, magic text, magic "whatever" to make your journey easier... If you really want to solve something that's bothering you - you have to make the effort yourself, take the time and fully focus on solving that problem - work on yourself!
Through this chapter, I will try to convey to you some of the techniques, exercises, tips that I learned by reading and practicing through the book "Stuttering and Anxiety, Self-therapy" by Lee G. Lovett and some techniques that I personally practiced even before I read this book.
Why should I listen to advice from a book?
Since I myself am skeptical of every approach to fighting stuttering and have gone through quite a few, and you probably are too, first I must share a little about the author of that book so you know who Mr. Lovett is and why he wrote that book.
Lee G. Lovett started stuttering in puberty, completely harmless. He was one of the best students in school and went to reading competitions and represented his school. On a completely harmless day, he was supposed to recite something in front of the class and accidentally stuttered.
The whole class laughed and that was the day he started stuttering and the fear of stuttering was "born", which he fed more and more every day because he was afraid that he would stutter again... He finished law school, became a lawyer and in his first case he couldn't even say his name in front of the judge... It totally destroyed him and he decided that he couldn't practice law anymore because how will he defend someone and talk in the courtroom if he can't even say his name?! He went into a huge crisis, he couldn't finance his family and they were on the verge of bankruptcy.
He started working more than one job to support his family and firmly decided one thing: "I have to find a way to stop stuttering!". He began to study everything related to stuttering, read all available books, until one day he discovered something while he was giving a speech in front of a group of people. He had to speak in front of a large group of people and he had terrible stage fright because he knew he would stutter. He decided to drop the first letter of the word he thought would stutter. And – imagine what happened! He didn't stutter at all! Not only that, but no one noticed that he left out the first letter of most words!
Then he realized that he needed to develop the techniques he would use in his speech and came up with the unique name - "CRUTCH". Everything else is history...
Today, Mr. Lovett helps every person who comes to him for help and does therapy with them for free via Skype, Twitch, Google, etc. Today, Mr. Lovett does not stutter at all and responsibly claims that no one has heard him stutter for over 20 years. This is all the more incredible because Mr. Lovett often gives speeches to large groups of people. Nowadays, he simply loves to talkand says that stuttering literally changed his life for the better and that he is much happier now than he was before he started stuttering!
Modern science, welcome!
We have learned many, many things in the past decades, but we are still learning and exploring new theories, new methods. This is how we discovered NEUROPLASTICITY, also known as neuronal plasticity or brain plasticity, the ability of neural networks in the brain to change through growth and reorganization.
I have to share a little bit of theory about to begin with:
Until recently, it was thought that the brain, once developed in childhood, no longer has the ability to renew itself or regenerate itself. But new research confirms the opposite. The adult brain generates new neurons that are able to learn, remember and create new synapses or reorganize old neural connections. Movement begins in the brain. Nerve cells in the brain, which are responsible for movement and motor skills, send impulses to the alpha-motor neurons of the spinal cord, which further transmit the impulse to the muscles.
Neurogenesis (development of new neurons) enables neuroplasticity of the brain, the brain's ability to reorganize itself after injuries, damage and degenerative diseases and compensate for lost function by creating new neural connections and by relearning and remembering.
Over time, the ability which was lost, such as speech, movement and walking, can be regained by allowing the healthy part of the brain or the remaining nerve fibers of the spinal cord to take over the function, resulting in an improvement in the person's physical ability. Intensive neurorehabilitation plays a decisive role in this process, encouraging the reorganization of the nervous system, enabling the patient to regain the functionality of the body as much as possible.
Why is this so important for stuttering? Because by controlling our speech, through the exercise and technique explained by Mr. Lovett, we feed the brain with new, more advanced, better speech and "reprogram" it the way we want it. Neuroplasticity has finally proven that by thinking positively, we can change the way our brain subconsciously thinks and reprogram it to not think so much about negative thoughts.
Neuroplasticity has proven that even elderly people can regain long-lost memories by training their brains and thoughts, so why not change your approach to speech? For me, fear was the biggest part of stuttering. Imagine that suddenly tomorrow you are not afraid to talk, that there is absolutely no fear and you feel happiness while talking. I believe you would stutter much less.
What is the purpose of neuroplasticity combined with stuttering?
The purpose is very simple, but also difficult (that's why you should think about it intensively in the beginning and train such thoughts). With the techniques and tasks you do (more on them later), when you stutter – you ignore the stutter and focus only on the words and sentences you said well. Nothing more, nothing less than completely forgetting to think about the times you stuttered! In this way, subconsciously, you will not "feed" stuttering and negative thoughts and your brain will begin to slowly reprogram itself to "capture" only positive experiences in your speech, and stuttering will decrease more and more!
There are two golden rules:
- You must hear the fluency of your speech to the maximum!
- You must not hear the inarticulacy!
Of course, don't expect instant results. As with any other training, you cannot reach the final goal instantly, but it takes time, will and commitment! Finally, autosuggestion and self-hypnosis ideally go with neuroplasticity, but more on that later.
"Crutches"
Mr. Lovett brilliantly came up with the crutches he used to combat stuttering. He doesn't use them anymore (or, as he says, in 99% of cases he doesn't use them) because now he has reached a state of mind where he neither needs nor thinks about them, nor does he stutter. The crutches he invented are also used by many well-known therapies (both in our country and in the world) and work incredibly well if they are used often. All crutches should be used and you should not be dependent on just one because then you are just looking for a "quick escape" while using various crutches helps in the fight against stuttering in the long run.
Without further ado, let's go through them (perhaps some of them are familiar to you):
Skipping the first letter in a word
Incredibly effective, yet so easy! Honestly, it never occurred to me in my 30+ years of stuttering to just skip the first letter of a word! I often got stuck on my name and that letter "T" was killing me, and as soon as I read about this "helper", I decided to try it with my wife and - she didn't even notice that I was skipping the first letters of the word!
For example take the sentence: "[T]oday was a really [b]eautiful day. [W]e could go for [a] [w]alk later". Throw out all the letters inside the square brackets and say this sentence to someone. No one or only a few will notice it and everyone will understand you. Fascinating!
A lot of us have problems with certain letters, so let's get rid of them! Remember, the important thing about this practice is not that you talk like this all the time, but that you feed yourself with positive speech and positive thoughts. As Mr. Lovett often repeats throughout the book, the crutches are not designed to replace your speech, but only so that with the help of neuroplasticity and your brain, you will reach a stage where you will not need the crutches at all!
Using synonyms, similar words or phrases
This "crutch" speaks for itself. If you can't say a certain word, eg "book", and if that word gives you problems, you can switch and say "publication", "literature" or just say the title of the book. Mr. Lovett went so far as to release a book on Amazon with 5000 different synonyms to help people and teach them how to use synonyms.
If you can't think of a synonym, you can use a phrase like "What title are you reading right now?" and similar. A quite simple "crutch" that also expands your vocabulary.
Skipping whole word or spelling
If you really get stuck and see that there is no point in trying to pronounce the same word again and again - skip it! As a last resort, you can spell the word if it's short or start spelling it and continue with normal speech.
Inserting an alternative word or sound
It is Mr. Lovett's favorite crutch. It's the idea of inserting a random thought, word or sound before the "scary word". A "scary word" is a word that you know you often stutter on. Each of us has such words and we know them well.
It is very important not to have a planned thought, word or sound prepared here, but to produce it without any thought. Our brain will do it by itself, without any effort. For example instead of the sentence "Can you tell me..." we start with "Tell me, can you tell me...". This is an example if you often stutter on words that start with the letter "m". A very light crutch, but very effective when used.
Another example is the use of a certain sound and this method will be recognized by a certain group of people who have been to therapies before. "Inserting" a certain sound like "mmmm", "aaaaa" before the beginning of a word is very useful and really works (I personally use it quite often)!
For example you will start the same sentence as "aaaaa, can you tell me...", but note that "aaaaa" is not spoken exclusively as the letter "a" but as a weak mumbling. It is very important to move from that pre-vowel "aaaaa" to the word without interruption, thus creating a "connection" and the word becomes much easier to pronounce.
Tell a story about a word you can't say
Having trouble pronouncing your name? You don't have to answer that question right away if you feel a lot of pressure! The idea of this crutch is to first tell something about your name or something about yourself in general.
Of course, it also depends on the situation you are in, but you can always find a way out of it. An example is given in the book when a new neighbor asked a female person who stuttered what her name was. She couldn't easily say her name without stuttering, so she started with “We're from Scotland, we moved here in 19xx. My name is Alice…”. With the opening sentence, she broke the initial tension and, by the time she reached the end, she was much more relaxed - she had overcome the stuttering in that sentence.
If you find yourself in a situation where you cannot simply tell the story of your ancestors, try some false "interruption" of thought, for example: "Your name, please?", "Just a moment, (grab your pocket as if your cell phone is vibrating) aaaamm Tomislav .”
Change or rephrase the entire thought
I believe we do that very often. Personally, I think I use this "crutch" most of all because, while I'm talking, I'm constantly changing the words, the arrangement of the words, and the overall thought. This is very good because you let your brain do what it needs to do without thinking, and that's important - don't think!
"Magic" – instant medicine
Mr. Lovett calls this "crutch" a "magical crutch" and calls it an instant cure for stuttering. It's about whispering, changing the volume of speech. We all know very well that we don't stutter when we whisper and what happened to Mr. Lovett is that he lost his voice.
During those few days he spoke perfectly and he realized that when he whispers - he doesn't stutter at all! So why not use it in critical situations? You can always pretend that your throat hurts for a moment and start whispering, but so that the other person can hear you, right?
Not only that, but by changing your tone while speaking, you can significantly reduce stuttering. You move from whispering to speaking louder and then back to whispering, and with a combination of that (meaningful combination of sentence flow) bring your speech to a state of fluency.
As Mr. Lovett claims throughout the book – “Remember! No one pays attention to your speech except you. You are your own biggest critic and you look for every flaw in your speech in order to further feed your fear of speaking!" That is so true! How often do you pay attention to someone else's speech and when someone stutters, "swallows" the first letter, or even a word? Almost never! Then why would you do this to yourself? The day you decide not to look at your speech and mistakes too critically, your speech will drastically improve.
Modulation of words
As the title of this "crutch" says - you can modulate your speech. Say some words louder and others more quietly. You know this yourself, when you imitate someone - you don't stutter or you stutter much less, so why not use it while you're talking? Put yourself in a role while talking and emphasize certain words, then completely reduce the modulation and speak more quietly, and thus combine!
You can also use this technique in the same sentence. For example: "WELcome!", where you emphasize the first part of the word, and "soften" the rest. It is a very good crutch that can be very useful in everyday speech.
Mr. Lovett divided his speech into four types:
- loud speech,
- normal speech,
- light speech,
- whispering.
At any moment, you can change your voice to one of the four listed.
Use of extreme pronunciation of words or emphasis
It sounds a bit strange, but this crutch is intended to "transform" into another person! Actor, friend, acquaintance, anyone! Simple - imitate someone's speech and stutter - it's gone! As I already stated, we don't stutter (or stutter very weakly) when we "goof off" and pretend to be someone else, right? The idea of that "crutch" is the answer to the question - is it better to stutter or imitate someone else's speech and speak normally? And the answer is clear...
Speak now and connect the words
A very important point that Mr. Lovett emphasizes throughout the book (and I completely agree with him) is that our brain knows how to speak! It doesn't matter whether you're breathing or making up a sentence. We must and should speak like any normal person.
Do "normal" people think about their speech? Absolutely not! So why should we? The best and most fluent speech comes when we are not thinking about speaking! No breathing and thinking techniques will help us (except when we use "crutches" to replace words, but the ultimate goal is to stop using them completely) but only one thing - stop thinking.
You know that feeling when you want to say something and you don't want to start! Then that word gets stuck in your brain and is constantly on the verge of coming out of your mouth, but you just can't say it! It's as if your mouth won't let it out! Then you start to clench your face and very often completely give up from saying it (if no one heard you wanted to start talking). This happens to us every day (or at least to me) and it is extremely tiring and frustrating!
So, do you have any thoughts? Just "blabber" it before you think about it! Start talking instinctively, not planned! Planning is what makes us nervous. Just imagine that someone tells you "Listen, in five minutes you will have to stand in front of the class and answer". So is there anything worse than waiting for those five minutes?! Five minutes of sweating, thinking. You repeat to yourself "I will stutter, I will stutter, I will stutter". By the time it's your turn, you've collapsed three times from stage fright and panic.
Wouldn't it be better if a professor, teacher or anyone called you out "on the spot" and said "Tomislav, tell me this and that". You don't have time to develop and feed that fear in your head of stuttering, you get up and have to say something right away. Done! No panic, stage fright, five minutes of terror!
So, speak immediately and now, without waiting, without time to feed the fear of stuttering!
Take a break!
You already know when you will stutter. You feel that tension on your lips. Then stop, don't even try to say that word! Take a breath, take a break, use some "crutch". Stop while you can!
Smile!
An extremely good "crutch" that everyone should use, not only us, people who stutter. Laughter works wonders... Whether it's laughter when you stutter and smile or when you think you're going to stutter and say that "difficult" word through a smile. A smile always helps and, best of all, it can be combined with all other "crutches"!
Autosuggestion
At the beginning, straight up - a lot of people at the sheer mention of "autosuggestion" wave their hands and say "Oh, autosuggestion, what nonsense is that, you're going to fill my head with some nonsense?! I need to talk to myself? Are you insane?! Well, I'm not crazy to talk to myself" etc. ...
I must make myself clear right away - the person who wants to "get rid" of stuttering and improve their life, will not say that any method is stupid if they have not tried it, but really tried it, without prejudice. Remember the part where I talked about neuroplasticity and brain reprogramming? Well, yes, that's why autosuggestion is there and that's why it's very important. Because autosuggestion is exactly what we do - we reprogram the brain.
Dr. Korb said, “You can consciously change the activity, chemistry and connectivity in your brain… Your brain is like a dog. It needs to be trained and requires repetition. Creating new habits takes a lot of work.”
OK, so how does autosuggestion work? Mr Lovett says you should use autosuggestive therapy at least twice a day for 20 minutes. Do it where you feel most comfortable - on a chair, armchair, couch or anywhere else. Sit back, take 10-20 deep breaths/exhalations and fully try to visualize yourself in stressful situations and say positive thoughts aloud to yourself! Repeat each positive thought at least 20 times.
Mr. Lovett also suggests that, in the beginning, whenever you have free time, you try to insert autosuggestion. Autosuggestion has a whole chapter in his book, so I can't accurately convey all of his thoughts here, but here are some of his ten positive autosuggestive thoughts (for speaking):
- Every day, in every way, my speech is getting better and better.
- If I can say ONE word anywhere, anytime, I can say any word, anywhere, always.
- I like to talk, I like to say my name "Lee".
- When I talk, I feel relaxed throughout my whole body.
- When I feel the need to talk, I will talk instantly, without planning.
- When I talk, I am focused on happiness and passion.
- I will repel any fear in any form.
- Under pressure, I will speak briefly using word associations, extreme enunciation and/or change my voice.
- I'll be smiling the whole time I'm talking.
- I will make today a happy day.
Neuroplasticity and our brain do everything else for us... This way we suggest to the brain and subconsciously "bombard" it with positive thoughts in order to reprogram it. Autosuggestion can be very effective if you approach it in a serious way, without prejudice.
If you refuse autosuggestion and don't believe in it - it won't work for you because you won't let it. To make progress, you must have an "open mind"!
There is a large number of books on autosuggestion and I advise you to read at least one of them.
Interesting facts
We are still on Mr. Lovett's book, and I will point out a very good part of it. Like many of us, Mr. Lovett didn't hesitate to see a psychiatrist, and one time psychiatrist Frank S. Coario, M.D. told him the following eye-opening facts:
- Everyone stutters, sometimes they have the potential to become a person who stutters, but most people don't worry about it and it never becomes a chronic problem for them. People who stutter should see occasional stuttering as "normal" and continue to talk. Other people don't care about your speech problem, they just want to understand you and move on. Period. They won't notice or remember if you stutter here and there. So, when you stutter, ignore it and keep talking.
- There are no physical obstacles as a cause of stuttering; only mental ones, period! (Though some books disagree with that, but Mr. Lovett disagrees with them).
- Stuttering is caused by excessive perfectionism - it reflects the fear that you are not perfect. Relax and give yourself a little extra credit – forgive yourself for not speaking perfectly and keep talking!
Mr. Lovett's book made a very good impression on me and I think it can be used for self-therapeutic purposes. All the mentioned techniques are widely used in much more well-known therapies that are paid for.
One important point in these therapies is that Mr. Lovett tries to explain that it is not enough to treat only the speech, which I agree with 100%, but the whole body, spirit, thinking, etc.
Other therapies (at least the ones I've attended) "treat" only speech, and thus, through success, your spirit starts to heal, your thinking, and positivity begin to prevail. If you are older and attending such therapies, you will probably have to practice the learned technique for the rest of your life (or for a very long time), while by working on yourself as a whole person, you will depend less and less on practice over time.
Not only because you will (maybe) overcome stuttering, but because you will reduce the fear of stuttering (as is the case with me).
Let's get back to the book! While reading it I practiced (when I would think of it) the techniques and tips from it and I have to admit that they worked very well, with minimal effort on my part.
I believe that if I devoted myself 100% to the task of never stuttering again - I would succeed in that, but my story is a happy story and I have no need for it because I no longer feed that fear as I used to feed it.
Since this chapter is about therapy and self-therapy, now that you have read the methods you can use, I will suggest how you can practice them and adapt them to your speech as much as possible:
- Reading aloud. Every day. Whenever you can. Not only books but also news, everything you read - read it out loud! Here, the first step can be to get the mentioned book and read it aloud. Listen to the fluency of your speech, feel it! Feel how you speak fluently and project that pleasant feeling on the rest of your day and on your communication with others!
- Autosuggestion. Every day. At least in the morning, when you wake up, and in the evening, before going to bed. Make a list of ten positive thoughts and repeat them every day. With understanding. Imagine being on stage in front of 500 people and speaking fluently.
- Ignore when you stutter and remember only fluent moments. Practice that attitude. Don't get stuck in negative thoughts and think about how you said something really badly. Get rid of that thinking completely.
- Constantly practice all the "crutches". As you read, insert them intentionally. Go through them all until they become easy for you to remember and use. It will help you a lot. If you can't remember them, print them out and stick them on the wall next to your desk or keep them in your pocket!
- Test your speech. Get yourself into stressful situations. You don't have to immediately stand in front of 50 people and talk, but you can try not to avoid some stressful situations such as talking on the phone, talking to a salesperson in a store, etc.
Mr. Lovett completely conquered stuttering in all segments. He humiliated it. Not everyone has such dedication and perseverance. Not for a single moment was he satisfied with only half results, but he wanted to achieve complete success and he succeeded in that. Find his videos and listen to the way he speaks! You wouldn't say he ever stuttered, and he stuttered so badly he couldn't say his name.
We are not all the same as Mr. Lovett and everyone interprets victory in their own way. My victory was the day I realized that I don't need to be afraid of stuttering and that (when I want to and when I focus) I can overcome it and resist it. Mr. Lovett does not accept anything less than a complete victory as a victory and always asks you for nothing less than 100% commitment.
Everything he asks of you is only a small part of what he himself has done in his life. He read countless books about stuttering, speech, self-confidence, autosuggestion, self-hypnosis and used all that acquired knowledge in the fight against stuttering and passed it on.